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I am done cooling off. Lemme vote already.

Bitched on: Saturday, April 30, 2011
Time: 4/30/2011 10:10:00 PM

Ok... I haven't blogged for what may seem like a gazillion years. So I am a bit rusty. This might all sound incoherent but oh well... I will try my best to rearrange my paragraphs and stuff. And I do believe it will take me at least a week to write down this 'essay'... all the stuff I've been hearing, digesting and then thinking, along with the emotions that comes with this... 'fever'.

Yes, I have been hit with the election fever... really badly... I was already feverish long before they announced the nomination day and polling day... when I was supposed to be working on my thesis. And now that I'm supposed to be concluding with my 5,000 words thesis report, here I am giving this entry my top priority. I can't help it. This election fever is infectious. And once infected, you are just longing for that one fateful day to get the results back; whether you will get better or be... doomed.

And don't write me off as another one of those noobs who are only vocal come elections. Those who will suddenly show so much interest in politics but in actuality knows jack....

Ok, neither am I saying I know every damn thing about the political situation here... If I did, I would have known how much we have in the reserves and I would have saved the late Dr Ong a whole lot of time prying the figures from the government.

But back to what I know. Singapore's political arena has never been this exciting since Independence. So much excitement and hype surrounding us - the people of Singapore. We are being wooed, being manja-ed... left-right-center. With promises to 'love-us-long-time' and 'deep-deep'. And of course not forgetting the occasional below-the-belt jibes at the other party wooing us.

PAP VS Oppositions.
82 out of 87 seats contested. Only one GRC walkover (a 35 second blunder of the century).
Possible 2-3 GRCs going to opposition parties.
Possible incumbent government losing many of the seats.

I'm sorry but 'incumbent' somehow sounds pretty negative to me... like 'incompetent' somehow... and I actually thought that was what 'incumbent' really meant until recently (oh snap, there goes my political 'credentials'). But then again, many of you would argue that the incumbent government has also been inco......... ehem....

Allow me to try to be neutral and not biased. Key word here is 'try'. I will try really really hard. Really hard. It is a no-brainer who I'm rooting for (note, key word here is 'root' not 'vote'. I would like to exercise my rights to keep my vote confidential).

So I've talked to friends; locals, foreigners, pro-PAP, pro-opposition, as well as watched the bias news on TV, read the bias papers which in turn made me turn to the net to read articles (courtesy of 'liking' The Online Citizen and not-to-be-one-sided-here, I've also 'liked' the PAP pages on Facebook), just trying to comprehend all these politics stuff and be updated up-to-speed. So what I have been seeing are arrows and spears flying across between these two camps and I am right underneath them.

Ever so patriotic.
Its true what Mr Tony Tan said, Singapore has been divided into two. But at the same time, strangely, Singaporeans have never been this united in the sense that we are extremely damn patriotic now. Each of us has an opinion (just ask your taxi driver next time for his). And each of us has probably never felt so strongly for this country, and neither have we felt ever so belonged and all of us suddenly want to be heard (via FB status, twitter and even the resurfacing blogosphere). Its like the past 40-er-something National Days all compressed into one. Saying the National Pledge has never been so meaningful to some until the past few days.

But like I've said, I have tried to be neutral. Hear both sides. But one thing that really annoys me is people who are really apathetic (to the extent, its really pathetic)... Statuses like "Why must my GRC be contested? Now have to go polling booth... Sianz" or "I know I should be patriotic and stuff... but there goes my plans on Saturday". Oh boo hoo. If you don't want to vote then give me your voting rights so I can double mine.

Another group that irks me is those who follow the crowd and have no opinions of their own. I say to this people, grow your own f*cking brains and decide. Do a bit of research before coming to a conclusion. You want to believe in some random blogger/singer/model/actor/eyebrow plucker with dipshit for brains, by all means.

Ball-less.
Then there are those who are convinced that their votes are not secret. So? "Oh, they are gonna find out whom I voted for, there goes my job/house application/promotion/bonus/(freedom?)". Again history is important, go learn what 1963 Operation Coldstore and 1987 Operation Spectrum is all about. Still relevant to these times? No, I don't think so. If it was, a lot of the 'oppositions' would be in prison by now.

Ask yourself this then, if you are so afraid of this people (or maybe you simply feel you would be inconvenienced in the future), then what does it say about who you are voting for? What does it say about the future you want for yourselves and your children's future? Should we all be living under this so-called fear for the rest of our lives? So ask yourself, what does it say about you?

Contradictions, contradictions.
Then there is another group who argues and argues until the cows come home, sleep, wake up, wander around again, get milked, then come home... again... without all the right facts and information. I get extreme joy from rebutting every single one of their arguments (sorry ah, but especially the PAP supporters. Yes, fine... I'm biased. But then again, I will always jump at any chance at a rebuttal when I see a contradiction). Like how they will first say to give Tin Pei Ling a chance to prove herself and in the same breath say the oppositions do not have any experience in 'running the country'. *scratch head*

So I say to this people, listen to yourself first before you open your mouth. Unless there are no contradictions, then you would just be helping me shoot your arguments down.

Another group which annoys me (again... sorry ah pro-PAP supporters) are those who have this mentality: 'Don't bite the hand that feeds you'. Firstly, I am not a dog. So to use that proverb is really insulting and plain stupid. Secondly, that is just simply saying that these opposition-supporters are ingrates and it is un-Singaporean to not support the PAP. Get this right, PAP is not the government. And no, the government will not crumble if we let anyone else in. Are we clearer now? And please do not confuse the first generation of PAP leaders to those we have today. The PAP then had laid the foundations to what Singapore has become today, yes, that I agree, very much.

FYI also please learn your (unbiased) history before you give all the credit (every single last one) to Mr Lee Kuan Yew. With all due respect, he was not the only PAP founder, nor was he the only person who revolutionised and dreamt and built every single thing that is in Singapore today; like reclaiming the marshlands of Jurong to get what we know today as Tuas for example... or the MRT train system... or botanical gardens (I was watching Martha Stewart 'in Singapore' one day and the STB guy kept saying LKY did this, this that...). The man is a man, a very smart and resourceful man, but he is still a man. Not a God. So please, give credit when it is due. And I also urge you to listen to both sides of the story, apparently this man, is no saint either.

Track Records
I feel it was necessary to have these 'iron-ruling' leaders for a nation that needs to not just be steered to a particular common direction but also to be stirred to wake up and progress. Yes, that 'patriarchal' form of governance back then was suitable. Now, it is completely irrelevant. People are convinced that the now elitist and arrogant PAP has been too detached from the rest of us 'mere mortals' while they throw lightning bolts from their Mount Olympus.

Which brings me to the next point. Some argue, the PAP has a proven track record. Well, yes, but again... DO NOT confuse the first few generations of PAP with the current one. They are different, even PM Lee admitted that himself. So pick a year, say from the 2001 or 2006 elections when most of the current ministers came into power. And compare their performance, solely their performance, and not the accumulated performance of generations after generations of PAP. I leave it to you to decide.

And please, the only reason why we say they have a good track record compared to the opposition is simply because..... the opposition doesn't have one... at least a substantial one to date. So how? Give them a chance lor. Vote them in, then five or ten years later you want to compare track record, then it would be fairer right? If they sucked then sack them lor. If not then their track record is better no?

And this is where the pro-PAP will immediately spring up and argue, 'how can we let our future be in the hands of these people then, just so we can test them out?' Well, I say, isn't it same for the new PAP candidates? *BAM! In your face!*

And if the next argument they bring up are the qualifications of the oppositions, "Are you so sure they are qualified?". Then I would be more than happy to slap their faces with all the combined degrees and resumes of the opposition which is substantially thicker than the PAP's candidates'. Get this straight, the oppositions today are just as capable and qualified as the PAP's candidates, some even more than some of the PAP candidates. Check their qualifications first before you make the sweeping comments. Besides, who says good academic results always equates to good leaders (this applies to both PAP and opposition teams)?

And then they ask, "But what can they do? It's all talk what! Why should I give them a chance? They only make promises and not explain how they are gonna keep it."

Read the f*cking manifestos. It is all in their manifestos. Numbers, quantities and details. Not pictures, not colours and definitely not brief statements.

Considerations, considerations.
So I've been to many rallies around Singapore, from as far as Serangoon Stadium to nearby ones at the Chinese Garden. And I have listened to both sides... (wait... it should be multiple sides). I am still partially undecided. I would say it would be an easy choice for me if I were to stay in Aljunied but alas I don't. I stay in Jurong GRC and its one of those boring GRCs if you ask me. More boring than West Coast GRC (at least they have JBJ's son). So why am I torn? Firstly, because Tharman, Halimah and gang (I dunno the rest but Lim Boon Heng was once part of the team here) have done a good job here AND in parliament. I have not seen any boo-boos from them. Plus, the opposition team being fielded here by NSP is a bit blah... On the other hand, there is the expectation (from myself, not anyone else) that there should be more opposition in the parliament.... so I am torn. See, I don't just follow blindly, I am actually deliberating.. really hard.

But to those who live in Aljunied GRC, Holland-Bukit Timah GRC and Bishan-Toa Payoh GRC, I think its a no-brainer... at least to me. So why am I feeling the way I am right now? About the PAP and the opposition? Hear me out.

Accountability
Ok, if you have been to enough opposition rallies, the points that they all keep bringing up (without fail) are the mistakes that the PAP have done. This is a good tactic, but its a lil' bit shallow if you ask me. Just listing out the long list of mistakes done by the PAP simply suggests (to me) that you only want to make the crowd angry and all riled up. But it should go deeper, some opposition speeches that have been outstanding to me, are those that do... and they brought up this thing called 'accountability'. Yes, people make mistakes. And mistakes can be forgiven.... but if and only if you know why you are forgiving the person. So, sorry right back atcha PM, your apology may have swayed some voters but to me (it kinda did...) but no, I will stick to my guns and demand to know why. Cause I do not believe in a government that is not transparent (it shows more humility rather than to accept blame, and it also shows respect because you are including Singaporeans in the 'loop').

So that said,
Dr Vivian should man up and explain why and how the YOG budget tripled. Yeah sure, you didn't have precedence for your initial quotes, but tell me why though the size of YOG was only one third of the Beijing Olympics but yet it was a mere 10% less than the latter? Didn't Beijing build huge stadiums and all?
DPM Wong Kan Seng should explain himself why and how Mas Selamat escaped.
Mr Yaacob Ibrahim should explain why and how there were floods in Singapore. And instead of blaming us first, or saying we aren't 'stoic' enough, couldn't you have done better damage control? I want to see you say that face-to-face to those who faced hundreds or thousands of dollars of damages.
Why am I going to pay close to half a million dollars for an HDB when HDB flats are now mostly prefabricated by HDB itself and tenders for construction is usually given to the lowest bidder? So what is the cost breakdown? Land is expensive and limited? Then why is SLA (which is under the government) selling it high? Who is losing money and who is making money now?
Can someone please explain how and why billions of Singaporean taxpayers' money are lost in investments - in government-owned corporations Temasek holdings and GIC? Why are there affiliated corporations in the first place?

The list goes on... and on it does.

Let's face it... A handful of the ministers and ministries have disappointed us with their lacklustre performance over the past few years. Yes, they have basically screwed up. Yes, they have made 'honest' mistakes. But is it easy to move on? When there were no explainations and apologies (not on their behalf but directly from them) put forward? Where is the accountability?

I don't demand their heads on the chopping block and their resignation (just like most oppositions who seem to be playing on the crowds' distrust and disgust with these ministers). I am simply asking them to explain themselves. What happened? I want to know. If their explanations make sense, then all is forgiven... truly.

Like in the case of Wong Kan Seng and the Mas Selamat fiasco, of course I don't demand him to step down simply because the most dangerous terrorist in Singapore ran out (slash that... hobbled out) of the supposedly most secured prison in Singapore. That is just plain silly. You don't prosecute a king in his ivory tower just because his lowly guard allowed a prisoner to escape.

Of course not, all that I am asking is, WHY? and HOW? Have the questions been answered? Not really... Am I satisfied with the answers? Hell no. There should be transparency and accountability and no details should be spared. We, Singaporeans, should know.

While still on this topic, he should definitely fire his advisers who 'advised' him to comb jungles and coastlines instead of putting his family members under surveillance. *facepalm*

The government had a good opportunity to prove themselves (with all of us Singaporeans behind them) when that Ionescu hit-and-run case fell into their laps. What has happened since then? I dunno... Swept under the rug is my guess.

So please, consider this, if you have the same bugging questions as me, who are the ones who are gonna ask them on your behalf? But if not the opposition? Yes, I do have notable examples of some PAP ministers who are not asleep in parliament and ask hard-hitting questions. For example, Dr Lily Neo, she is (in my opinion) the PAP minister with the biggest heart. Unfortunately for her, and Lim Boon Heng, their opinions are swallowed by the majority. No groupthink? Think again Mr Lim. Partially the reason the you cried is probably because you were helpless then... and many more ministers like you who think and say otherwise will also be helpless now.

Foot-in-the-mouth Disease.
All the PAP ministers seem to have this. And its very infectious... Even Mr Lee Kuan Yew has it (and he isn't sorry that he has it. He stands corrected). Why are they shooting their mouths off especially before the elections? All their past 'mortals', 'hawker centre, food court or restaurant', 'once in 50 years' and 'maids in other countries' comments are really facepalm-worthy. These basically show how much these ministers are so out-of-touch from the rest of us.

Speaking as a minority, a Muslim-Malay-raised individual, the comments that many ministers have said have been downright insulting. George Yeo's "Christians are less likely to riot" comment, Yacob's "Malay should be a foreign language" comment and Mr LKY's 'hard truths' are hard to swallow. But are they true? Give me stats then I will shut up. But no matter what it is still insensitive and insulting to bring it up. And what is up with all this generalising? Haven't they heard of the word 'some'? 'Generalising' is instant fail. Just ask my General Paper teacher.

It is already enough that there is unspoken but blatant racism in the army. You want me to integrate? Then stop marginalising me and "my kind".

(On a side note: if I were in parliament, I will fight to remove 'race' from our identification cards. Its not relevant anymore. I am Singaporean first, more than anything else. I will also fight for lower defense budget... Look, wars are almost irrelevant in today's time. We should look at Costa Rica for precedence. Yes, they are surrounded by many unstable south American nations - with military juntas and coups, but do you know they do NOT have an army? Instead, the money that could have gone to their military expenses, they directed it to preserving their share of the Amazon rainforests and other nation-building expenses. Learn from that.)

Apologies, apologies.
I just have one more question now, I just to need to know why you are apologising... now. Why were you not apologising back then in 2006? During the past five years, mistakes after mistakes. Why are they suddenly u-turning policies very unpopular with us Singaporeans? Why are the issues only addressed today? Why not then? Housing policies, immigration policies and transport issues. Any more? Feel free to add.

We were unhappy back then. We showed our displeasure. But why now? You are suddenly scared of us? You need a strong mandate from us?

Heat.
Are you feeling the heat of the election fever?

I can't help but feel really sorry for Mr George Yeo; he is definitely in the hottest seat ever (but we keep forgetting he has other khakis to share that hot seat). General consensus is that it would be a pity to lose one very good Minister to usher in WP's A Team (if that happens). This is the flaw of the GRC system, isn't it? A damn good example if you ask me.

GRC should be removed. It is nothing but gerrymandering. Unworthy candidates riding on the coattails of senior politicians. Bullocks. I want you to be my MP, not the other 3 or 4. And if minority candidate for the PAP Michael Palmer wins his SMC, I hope they think twice about making excuses that GRCs are needed only because minority candidates will have no chance contesting in SMCs.

Did you know JBJ still won his seat in his majority-Chinese-populated Anson SMC? And since then, PAP's 'big loss', GRCs were implemented? Did you know the number of minority representatives in parliament has been more or less the same before and after GRC's implementation? And there was even a year (after the implementation) that the number of minority representatives dipped below the lowest number of minority candidates pre GRC-implementation? Go look that up. And remove GRCs, please. Your reasons for it are bullocks.

I think this 'cooling off' day is aptly named. We need to cool off and think.
I suggest you list down all the pros and cons for both parties contesting in your ward. I just did.

Thank you for spending the time to read this entry of mine. I don't wish to sway your votes, nor do I intend to force my opinions down your throat. They are just my humble opinions and like the thousands of Singaporeans around, I want these opinions to be heard. I cannot keep quiet anymore.

Disclaimer: So I kinda did contradict myself at the beginning when I said I would try to be neutral but I am sorry if it hasn't, I have come to my own conclusion. The tribe has spoken.

Peace.

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Mortal Kombat, my way.

Bitched on: Friday, November 26, 2010
Time: 11/26/2010 04:25:00 PM

Its been a while since I've blogged and frankly, I haven't felt the need to. Plus, blogging isn't cool anymore. Who gives a fuck about what is happening in your life anymore? We have Twitter for that. Even that, the people who 'follows' you won't give a rat's ass about your dumb poems, where you are or what you are doing (unless its 'who you are doing').

But recently, I've been feeling overwhelmingly frustrated and disgusted with the world around me. And I just have to blog about it.

Woah... so angst-y.

But seriously... what is wrong with the world right now? Has it become increasingly violent and morbidly inhumane or has it always been the same but since the world is now connected and you can find basically anything on the web that we are being exposed to all these callous and perverted shit?

For the record, I am not against the fact that with the Internet we can share and be exposed to this shit, in fact, I'm glad cause without these videos, blogs, sites or whatever, we wouldn't know such atrocities exist.

Yes, as you may already have an inkling, I'm talking about the videos and pictures of Chinese women stomping, crushing and dismembering cute furry bunnies or kittens with their stilettos.

That is just probably the tip of the iceberg, I've seen thumbnails of other videos (no guts to watch any of them) of dogs being stomped on, cats having their eyes gorged out with the stilettos and bunnies being beheaded or having their ears snipped off with scissors. What is wrong with these people???

I can't even stomp on a cockroach or snail knowingly! Even if I did accidentally crush a snail, I would take about 15~30 mins apologising and mourning for it (depending on the size). How could they be so heartless?

Don't even get me started with that shock video which leaked early this year on the Internet, "3 Men and a Hammer"; 2 Ukrainian 19-year-olds who tortured and killed a helpless man with a hammer and screwdriver.

They smashed his face in with the hammer, stabbed him in the eye and stomach with the screwdriver and mutilated his body beyond recognition! All this recorded in the video and all this happened right beside the road. And they were so 'cool' about it. (They have been charged with 21 other murders, some of the acts filmed too).

Oh, I didn't watch it. I felt faint just listening to the audio for a few seconds (had my eyes covered)...

To laugh and smile while killing and torturing someone (or something) really takes a lot of sickness in the head. Seriously.

Fucking. Fucking. Sick. In. The. Fucking. Head.

Even here in Singapore, with all these street gangs suddenly resurfacing and slashing each other with parangs (machetes) and stuff over the most mundane reasons! Please lah, it seems that any Tom, Dick or Harry can be in the secret societies nowadays. What happened to all the 'gang decorum' and 'initiation rituals' of yesteryear? At least there was a certain 'honour' and 'tradition' in those gangs.

As reported in the newspapers, the murderers of Darren Ng were laughing away as they slashed at him with their parangs. So we charge them with murder (but they are probably not going to get hanged anyways...).

But instead of being a deterrent or warning to potential gangs and their activities, more slashings have occured at Bukit Panjang, Teck Whye and across Singapore, all less than 2 months since Darren Ng's death.

Like seriously?

Have the youths or the world today (in general) been THAT desensitised to violence? We don't even give a flying fuck about someone's life or (for crying out loud) the consequences.
Have we become THAT inhumane?

This is so vexing. So frustrating. So disgusting. So perplexing.

So allow me to offer a solution to all these violence. We should counter all these violence with MORE violence. I mean, nothing really deters a thief from stealing than having his hands cut off, right?

We should have a tournament made for these sick people. A tournament with all these fight-to-the-death matches. And I, as the umpire, will start the tournament with the stiletto-wearing Chinese tramps and parang-welding gangster-wannabes.

As you would have already predicted, the scrawny welding-arms of the gangster-wannabes are no match for the sharp heels of the Chinese tramps (probably cos all the cheap-looking tattoos weighed them down) and they have their eyes gorged out.

Next match, these tramps go against the sick duo from Ukraine. But alas, their heels are no match for the duo's hammers which pounded their faces all the way down to their asses.

The two Ukrainian boys will now have to face off each other to be the ultimate champion of this tournament. They will have to slice/chop off the most amount of flesh from their own bodies in a sixty-second face-off ala Saw (I forgot which one...).

The winner (and eventual survivor) would be the ultimate champion and he would be rewarded with a dildo stuffed up his you-know-what (no, not back there; but ala 'Kids in Sandbox'). And he will have all the sex he wants with a huge hung horse.

Until he dies of exploded internal organs. And then we drape his coffin with one of the swimming trunks of Singapore's water polo team.

The end.
Now, who is with me?

PS: I have NOT linked this entry to any of the violent videos I have mentioned above but its not hard to find it on the Internet. And if you do find these videos, I should NOT be held responsible for your vommiting (or arousal, if you are THAT sick). Peace.

Labels: violence

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Questions from childhood answered.

Bitched on: Saturday, April 10, 2010
Time: 4/10/2010 03:23:00 PM

As I sat on the bus, on my way to school, I was suddenly self-conscious that my long hair was making my head look big.

That made me have a flashback from many eons ago right after my circumcision. A conversation between my dad and the doctor went something like this:

Dad: So when is the 'ring' going to come off?
Doctor: It would take a couple of weeks or maybe more... His head is big.

And there I was lying on the clinic bed, wondering why the hell did the size of my head mattered at all.

And ever since then, I have always been self-conscious that I have a very big head which I never really could see...

And then it dawned on me. I broke into a huge grin.
Now it makes more sense!

*slaps forehead*

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Happy Birthday Orked Alesha

Bitched on: Thursday, January 07, 2010
Time: 1/07/2010 04:44:00 PM

Today marks my niece's second birthday.

Due to my laptop's premature demise today (always happens when school is about to start... dammit), Uncle Izan does not have pictures to upload now...

But don't let that blemish your special occasion, my beautiful Alesha, uncle Izan is very grateful to have you in his life and will always love you forever and ever.

Have a wonderful day (as you always do, with me... hahaha).

Loving you unconditionally,
Uncle Izan

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2009 Boomz and Shingz.

Bitched on: Thursday, December 31, 2009
Time: 12/31/2009 11:59:00 PM

I intentionally had this entry published on this day. I won't be in Singapore on the 31st (by the time you read this) so this entry would be pre-written and scheduled to be published then (or today...hmmm...)

31st December marks the anniversary of this humble blog of mine. It has been 4 long and wonderful years. Not only that, this entry marks the 400th entry. So that is a hundred entries per year (kinda... I didn't really blog much this year). So to make up for my absence for a whole chunk of this year, I will try to squeeze in 2009 into one entry.

This is my annual 'People & Events of the Year'!
I thought I would expand my list this year to the Top 25 (instead of just 10 like the past 3 years). So here goes, MY very own list:

25. Let's start with our very own pride and joy, Taufik Batisah. Taufik's boo boo singing the National Anthem wrongly at the F1 event just proves to show that regardless of race, language or religion, you CAN sing the national anthem wrong.

24. Still in Singapore, number 24 goes to the S Factor 'Babes'. I have to use the word 'babes' loosely this time round... unless your idea of a 'babe' is someone who can shoot electricity out of her eyes or give 'seductive' eye contact. *cue for crickets* Even the finalists were rather un-babe-lious. Like 'siriously', what did the 'S' stand for? Stupid? Sucky? Slutty?

23. Next up is Miley Cyrus... Rich, famous and young. Can't blame her for having a little bit of racist fun, right? The Asian dude is so not game...

22. After 398 days since he hobbled out of Whitley Road Detention Centre, Singapore's number one fugitive, Mas Selamat, has been caught on the 1st of April in Johor. The only 'April' fool that emerged out from this whole mess is the Singaporean government when the Malaysian authorities not only refused to hand him over (indefinitely), but had not informed their counterparts for almost 6 weeks that they had him in detention. "Singapore government knew that Mas Selamat had been arrested", yeah, yeah right...

21. From the number one fugitive we move on to the number one man who was on my list last year, Barack Hussein Obama II. Undoubtedly the busiest man of 2009, he signed a $787 billion simulus package to curb the financial crisis, extended an outreach to the Muslim world, overhauled the entire US health care system and last but not least, won the 2009 Nobel Peace Prize (that despite deploying additional 30,000 troops to Afghanistan)... You would think he wouldn't have the time to hit the beach.

20. Blame E.T. (Entertainment Tonight) for drilling into my head the choice for number 20; Jon and Kate from 'Jon & Kate Plus 8'. I don't care that they are divorced, or which one of them had been unfaithful first, or who is the one stashing away money or whatever...

I just feel sorry for the 8 kids for having parents who are such media whores (same goes for the dad of the 'balloon boy'). And you think it would have been the eight kids who would be the attention seeking ones...

19. Number 19 is the foulmouthed Christian Bale. He 'delivered' an expletive-radden rant at a crew member during the filming of the new Terminator movie when the crew member 'trashed' his scene by walking into his 'line of sight'... Sheesh.... D.I.V.A.

18. Technically, 'Nobody' was so last year... But it only got super uber popular beginning of this year. From its very catchy dance steps in the MV to the even more catchy lyrics, the Wonder Girls' 'Nobody' caught the world by storm - from Thai prisoners to a bored Korean air-traffic controller. An English version to the song was released in June this year but it came out too late and the song's popularity had already died down, not to mention it was sooooo CRINGE-worthy.

17. From the Wonder Girls to the 'Wonder Women'. Who can forget the drama that centred around AWARE? From the calculative takeover, to the all-Christian and all-Chinese 'new' exco, and to the $90,000 spent within weeks of the new exco, a lot of people in Singapore were outraged... And in a show of solidarity or you can call it new-age 'mob behaviour', the new exco (headed by Josie Lau) was ousted after a vote of no confidence during the 6-hours long EGM.

16. He was almost crowned American Idol 2009 but lost out to the less controversial and BORING Kris Allen (plus his rendition of 'No Boundaries' totally kicks Kris's ass), he is Adam Lambert. His performance at American Music Awards is precisely the reason why he didn't win - because we are not ready for him...

Yes, we know you are as gay as Bruno's crotch in Eminem's face...

15. Now back to Singapore, number 15 is Reverend Ming Yi. He is the founder and former CEO of Ren Ci Hospital. What's with all the controversy? Well, firstly he loaned his assistant $50,000 (from Ren Ci's fund) when Ren Ci Hospital is supposedly thriving on donations and stuff... To make it even more controversial, the monk owns race horses... Like seriously, what the hell? I wanna be a monk like that...

14. Sezairi Sezali, our third Singapore Idol. He had all the odds stacked up against him. Another Malay male Singapore Idol? Even I had wanted to vote for Sylvia initially but after hearing how biased the judges were (Ken especially) and feeling that Sezairi nailed all 3 songs that night, we switched camps and voted for him. Sezairi Sezali was eventually crowned Singapore's third Singapore Idol on 27th December to the dismay of Ken Lim... Sorry Sylvia, Ken made me do it.

13. Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab is at unlucky number 13. The Nigerian Muslim had wanted to detonate plastic bombs hidden in his underwear on Christmas en route to Detroit. He instead burned his pants off and was subdued by passengers and crew members. Not only did he put the spotlight on aviation security system, he singlehandedly made us Muslims look bad... again...

12. Closer to home, Malaysian Tourism Minister Ng Yen Yen, made headlines by proclaiming that chicken rice, nasi lemak and chili crab (to name a few of the dishes) were Malaysian dishes and that other countries (we wonder who...) were hijacking them... If Singapore and Malaysia were ever to go to war, it will be all about food. And lady, you took the first step.

11. At number 11 is Queen Beyonce Knowles. Her song "Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It)" went on to top the Billboard Hot 100 chart, for four non-consecutive weeks, giving Beyonce her fifth number one single in the United States. Its MV won the 2009 BET Awards Video of the Year. In addition, it was nominated for a total of nine awards at the 2009 MTV Video Music Awards, and ultimately won the award for Video of the Year. And that is just for that one song and its 'simple' MV.

In October, Beyonce was honored with Billboard magazine's "Woman of the Year" award. Beyonce also leads the 52nd Grammy Awards, receiving 10 nominations.

10. Just making it to top 10 is Taylor Swift. The poor girl had Kanye West raining on her parade at the MTV Music Awards when he ran onto the stage and embarrassed her by saying Beyonce should have won instead. Stupid Kanye West and his drunken tirade; this is not his first time being a sore loser too. But our sweet Taylor Swift had the last laugh when she snagged Jacob, yes THE Jacob from Twilight.

9. Next on the list is pilot C.B. 'Sully' Sullenberger.

Who? He is the hero who saved hundreds of lives when he landed his malfunctioning plane on the Hudson River (Manhattan) saving the 155 passengers on board. Its inspiring and heroic stories like this amidst the gloom and destruction that is really worth highlighting.

8. At number 8 is Rihanna. Poor girl had her battered face all over the front pages of newspaper worldwide. The abuser, then-boyfriend Chris Brown, was thrown in jail for assault charges. She recalls what happened in an interview with Diane Sawyer:

"I was bleeding. I was swollen in my face. So there was no way of me getting home, except for, my next option was to get out of the car and walk ... start walking in a gown, in a bloody face? So I really don't know what my plan was."

By the time the police came, she was already "battered" and when asked what caused the fight initially, she would only say that her boyfriend lied to her. So shouldn't she be doing the battering?

7. At number 7 is David Hartanto Widjaja, the final-year Engineering NTU student who leapt to his death after allegedly stabbing his professor with the latter's knife. Just why he did all that is still a mystery. And his professor is keeping mum. Mystery unsolved. Sheesh...

6. Speaking of unsolved mysteries... Number 6 goes to the 'unknown' driver of the hit-and-run case at Bukit Panjang on December 15th (yeah right... we sure as hell know who he is...). 3 victims - one died (3 weeks after his wedding for God's sake, his life support unplugged on Christmas some more!), one seriously injured and one discharged. Can the driver be caught already??? Oh wait, he flew back to his country like a coward shit. And that was after creating a whole string of lies. We have two witnesses. Isn't that enough? Jail his ASS NOW.

Us Singaporeans are not stupid and most of all, I believe the authorities are not corrupt.

Before I go into the Top 5, here's a look at 20 notable events in 2009:

20. Miss Gibraltar was crowned Miss World 2009 on 12th December. All together now, Miss Whaaa-t?

19. The cricket team from Sri Lanka was attacked on the 3rd of March by 12 gunmen while in Pakistan. 6 of the players were injured and 6 policemen and 2 civilians were killed.

18. In July, a series of violent clashes erupted between Uyghurs, Chinese state police, and Han residents in the city of Ürümqi resulting in at least 197 deaths and scores injured.

17. Mas Selamat was recaptured on 1st of April. Collective sigh of relief...

16. Dubai finally 'succumbs' to the global financial crisis. On 14th December, neighbour Abu Dhabi gave Dubai US$10 billion to clear Dubai World debt...

15. Singapore's very own Merlion had a bald patch after being struck by lightning on 28th February. So suay...

14. Sri Lankan civil war officially ends on the 17th of May after more than 2 decades of war with the defeat of LTTE.

13. Starting from the 13th of June, protests followed the 2009 Iranian presidential election against alleged electoral fraud and in support of opposition candidate Mir-Hossein Mousavi.

12. The longest solar eclipse ever recorded occurred on the 22nd July this year.

11. Air France Flight 447 was a scheduled commercial flight from Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, to Paris, France, that crashed into the Atlantic Ocean on 1 June 2009, killing all 216 passengers and 12 crew members.

10. NASA found water on the moon on 24th of September after crashing a rocket. Talk about lucky...

9. North Korea launches 7 missile launches into the Sea of Japan on the 4th of July (talk about defiance) and conducted underground nuclear tests in May.

8. 8.3 magintude near Samoan islands triggered tsunamis on September 29th; with 189 people killed, it was the largest earthquake of the year.

7. Gaza strip ground invasion ended on 18th January. Between 1,166 and 1,417 Palestinians and 13 Israelis were killed during the Gaza War.

6. Typhoon Morakot hits Taiwan on the 7th of August, leaving 461 people dead and 192 others missing, most of whom are feared dead and roughly NT$110 billion in damages.

5. The rojak food poisoning in Singapore in March-April killed 2 women in Singapore and over 140 cases were reported.

4. 7.6 magnitude Sumatran earthquake occurred on September 30th, with confirmed 1,115 dead, 1,214 severely injured and 1,688 slightly injured.

3. Typhoon Ketsana hits Philippines on 25th September; with at least 464 deaths officially reported of which at least 86 people were reported dead in landslides and floods.
2. The 2009 United Nations Climate Change in Copenhagen was held between 7th - 18th December. There was so much hype about it, even nicknaming it Hopenhagen. But all we got was more bad news. We are doomed. We are going to die. Brace yourselves. 2012 is probably going to happen.

1. Swine Flu also known as H1N1 tops the list. First detected in April, it has since gone on to claim 12,220 lives worldwide. If pandemics don't kill us, global warming will.

Now back to the People of 2009:

5. Top 5 now and at number 5 is media darling, Susan Boyle. Her video in YouTube drew 83 million viewers! That is like more than 16 times the population of Singapore! Why her popularity? Blame it on our prejudice that someone that looks like her can't sing something like that... Fugly talented underdogs worldwide rejoice!

4. My favourite singer of 2009... Lady Gaga is at number 4. Some hate her, some 'don't get' her but I totally worship her. Gimme some of your Bad Romance....

Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah! Mum-mah-mum-mum-mah! GaGa-oo-la-la.

3. In top 3, I know, some of you would disagree but its our very own Ris Low!!! The dethroned Miss Universe Singapore first embarrassed herself (and us Singaporeans) when she was interviewed by RazorTV! Who are we kidding? Some Singaporeans do sound like that.

But I have to admit, as much as I hate her initially, I now love her to bits. She is shameless and her pronounciations kinda endearing. Plus, who can hate someone who is a klepto, is bi-polar and have an unsound mind? She was even named one of CNN's 25 Influential People in Asia! We just love our criminals, don't we?

2. Coming in second is a tiger in bed, as much as he is on the golf courses; he is of course, Tiger Woods. 14 lovers and counting. He once had that squeaky clean and faithful husband image but that is all bull. He's 'lion' to his wife and he is a 'cheetah'. Yeah, I'm sick of that joke as well.

WDF Tiger?

You cheated on that hot wife of yours? Please keep your little 'tiger' in your pants... Plus Rihanna should learn a thing or two from your wife about dealing with infidelity, smash your (soon-to-be) ex's prize possession (in this case, his car) with another one of his prize possession (in this case his clubs). But not before you whopped his ass, of course.

1. 2009 was a year with so many stars who died so suddenly and tragicly. Stephen Gately, Brittany Murphy, David Carradine, Farah Fawcett and Patrick Swazye died way too soon.

But of course, the number one person on my 2009 list has to be the King of Pop, Michael Jackson. June 25th, the whole world stood silent and in shock as they watch the video footages of the King being wheeled into a hospital.

And later, the world cried buckets when his death was confirmed. The King of Pop was gone.

To some he was a great entertainer, an idol and even a 'god'. He was the true inspiration to all of us.

R.I.P. Michael.

This is it! 2009 had been a great year! Or should I say a boomz year.

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My Hope for Copenhagen.

Bitched on: Thursday, December 17, 2009
Time: 12/17/2009 03:37:00 AM

I hope that we will live in a world with less convenience.
A world where a can of Coca Cola costs not just a dollar but a thousand dollars.

Why a thousand dollars?
Simply because that would be the actual cost of a can of Coca Cola.

Not convinced?

Firstly, about half of the cost would go to the extraction of that volume of aluminium you find in an aluminium can from some African country or Indonesia.

That could possibly pay for trees which were felled per square metres to extract that volume of ore; for the loss of habitat of some species and/or the land of the natives per square metre; and for the endangering or extinction of some plant or animal species (costs depending on the size or 'usefulness' of the species).

Another 50 dollars could also possibly cover the medical fees of the worker who had to extract the ore from sulphur gas-filled volcanic environment. Surely, that money would also have to cover the worker's pay sufficiently so that he won't be 'exploited', right?

Oh, don't forget, we also have to pay for the ingredients for the Coca Cola itself. We have to plant cocoa plants and sugar cane (for the sugar.. duh...). So we need to clear more land and harm more habitats. We also have to extract Kola nuts from the fragile South American rainforests. Add a few hundred dollars to pay for all that.

We need to be paying for the transportation of the ore/ingredients (we need to clear more forests for roads) to the factories (more land cleared, more workers who shouldn't be exploited).

About another couple of hundred dollars should be spent on the actual energy and pollution costs from the burning of fuel during extraction to transportation and finally to the whole process of production that can of Coca Cola (that is very energy intensive, FYI).

Spare a few fifties to pay for water wasted and/or polluted during the whole production. Don't forget the energy consumed when that can of Coke leaves the factory and into your hands.

Did I miss anything? Maybe I did, but I hope you can get the picture.

If this is really going to happen, I hope that there would be recycling bins that would pay you back about a thousand dollars for recycling. Only then would we understand the value of recycling, no?

Fortunately that hasn't happened yet. A can of Coke doesn't and will never cost a thousand dollars.

But all the other things I mentioned earlier have happened and are happening now to bring that can of Coca Cola into your very hands.

So take the value of money out of the equation and look at everything else that matters: life.

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HOPEnhagen!

Bitched on: Friday, December 11, 2009
Time: 12/11/2009 06:08:00 PM

Sign the petition. News from Hopenhagen:

The UN Climate Change Conference is underway in Copenhagen. At the opening sessions on December 7th, the Danish Prime Minister announced that "for the next two weeks, Copenhagen will be Hopenhagen." This message of optimism and hope has been reported by media around the world as global citizens look to the talks to yield a positive outcome for our planet.

As we now enter critical days in the conference, here are some good ways to stay up to date on what is happening on the ground.

With editorial partner TakePart, the Hopenhagen Blog is covering news and events at the conference from various points of view. Our guest blog entries just this week have included Al Gore and Bill McKibben.

Starting today, we are launching a series within our blog from David Kroodsma, our Hopenhagen Ambassador. David was chosen for this job by the Hopenhagen community, and we could not be more proud to be sending him to Copenhagen to represent us and report back.

The Hopenhagen Facebook group and Twitter feeds are very active with posts from our team on the ground and discussions amongst fans.

And if you're in Copenhagen this week, visit HopenhagenLIVE for a list of events, including Earth Hour Hopenhagen on December 16th. Come to the Messages of Hope Pavilion in City Hall Square to share your video message of hope.

Check back often to the Hopenhagen Blog for the latest updates, and if you haven't already, join us on Facebook and Twitter.

Let's turn Copenhagen into Hopenhagen!

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