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Sex in the City Part 3, Sarong Party Girls
Bitched on: Sunday, March 19, 2006
Time: 3/19/2006 04:10:00 PM
Also check this video out on why Asian guys can't get white girls.Time: 3/19/2006 04:10:00 PM
Highly recommended. Totally hilarious!!
But it will take a while to download. So I suggest you pause it while it's downloading in another window and you read my blog. Haha...
Sarong Party Girls...
SPGs...
How they disgust me.
How do I define SPGs?
No, I don't label Asian ladies with caucasian boyfriends or husbands as SPGs.
That would be like insulting the foremothers of the Eurasian community. And I would also be insulting a lot of my cousins and friends who married caucasian men (though I have a feeling one or two of these cousins of mine are SPGs, those gold-diggers)...
Instead, I define SPGs as Asian women (be it Chinese, Indian, Malay, Jap etc)who only look at caucasian men and totally disregard their asian male counterparts. Cliche as this sounds, they are bananas, yellow on the outside but white (trying to be) in the inside. A banana that hangs out in bunches in bars and pubs like CHIJMES, China Jump, Insomnia, whole stretch of Boat Quay and other watering holes for ang mors (caucasian in Hokkien).
They throw themselves at anything white with a dick.
Their idea of Mr Right is only Mr White.
Here are some reasons as to why 'going west' sounds more appealing.
Some (notice I use 'some') see caucasian men as a ticket out of this country.
Some even see western surnames as something more prestigious than asian surnames, kinda like a title (Duchess, Datin... you get the picture) for those 'atas' (higher class in Malay) female yuppies...
Then there are some who find the occidental looks more appealing. Or they dig the western cultures (which they find superior to eastern cultures)... and they see that sleeping around is so liberal and Westernised (all thanks to Carrie Bradshaw and her friends...).
Here's a more tongue-in-cheek definition.
I stumbled across a blog written by the SPG. Yes, Miss Izzy herself. If that name sounds familiar, here's something to refresh your memory. The despo (i.e. desperate) who posted nude pictures of herself on her blog.
Read more about it it in Kennysia.com (reader's discretion is advised, contains some nudity, though unflattering the pictures are...).
You can also find her giving sex advice on Singapore's FHM (For Him Magazine). Does it ring a bell now?
Yes, the SPG with the pre-pubescent face (...and chest might I add). She reminds me of Christina Aguilera in the Lady Marmalade music video. Like a little flat-chested tramp in lingerie.
Recently, I saw her on TV in Get Rea! (a Channel Newsasia programme) about teenage pre-marital sex and stuff (post-Tammy NYP videos). Her faux British accent often slipping into obviously her local accent. (What? She talks this way?) Despite her own advice in her blog entry (on How to be a Super SPG... Read: a Super Whore)
"4) Don't talk in a fake accent. If you have a tendency to lapse into it, not because you think it makes you sound oh so sophisticated (when in reality you sound like a crazy windbag) ...."Babe, you should listen to your own advice. You sound like one...
Another familiar trait of a typical SPG. Fake accents. Either British or American, these accents are a necessity to an SPG (like packs of condoms). God knows where they get it from. Television, peers or their one-night stands... These accents irritate me.
A good teacher and mentor of mine (who is coincidentally married to a well-known ang mor DJ) coined this term for them, the Cold Storage accents. Why? Well, the coldest climate these SPGs have ever experienced was when they went to Cold Storage... Go figure.
Unless you were born in the UK, with British parents, schooled with British peers or taught by British teachers all your life, I don't see any reason as to why you have to speak that way if you are a true-born-and-bred-in-Singapore-Singaporean. Its so irritating!!!
Enough about accents. Let's touch on more about Miss Izzy herself (I'm sure we won't be the first and the last ones).
Her ranting and raving about why white is best can make the blood of any Singaporean male boil.
She gave three reasons as to why this is so.
Again this is untrue. While most expats do come here with wallets fat with cash, let's not forget, they did in fact come here for jobs. Says a lot about their career prospects in their native country, ay?"Reason one, they're loaded. It's not that I'd want them because they're a walking credit card, but having a huge disposable income means excessive dates, extravagant holidays and kinky underwear."
I am not a xenophobic, in fact I welcome foreigners to my country, be it American capitalists or Chinese study mamas or Bangladeshi odd job labourers. I mean if they come here to help build my country up, why not?
But I do stop short of supporting foreign-born representatives in the Olympics Games or other areas of achievement (like scaling the Mount Everest for example)... Some might argue that Singapore is a country built up by our forefathers who were immigrants too. However, in today's context, I see Ronald Susilo and Li Jiawei as borrowed talent (I'm sorry but I do). No matter how much pride they bring to our country, its just not the same...
Ok, Ok, enough digression. Let's continue with reason number two given by Miss Izzy.
"Caucasians are better then local men in bed. But let's just not go into the tasteless details. Just leave it at the fact that Asians suck. The Chinese have small penises and the Indians are the most prone to ED -that's erectile dysfunction for the uninitiated."
Who believes that she slept with the entire population of men in the world to make the statement above, raise your hand.
I mean not only is she is insulting the locals, she has also collectively insulted Asians worldwide!
And finally reason number three.
"Finally, local boys live with their parents... Either you have to sneak into their bedrooms, still littered with broken He-Man toys from 2 decades back well past midnight, or book into a hotel room- remember how broke they are?..."
Well, I am sorry, but that, my friend, is called filial piety. And again, did she sleep with the whole of Singapore for her to say this bull?
She has other reasons (in a different entry... but I won't go too much into detail ...cough bullshit ehem..) as to why white is better.
Here's a classic reason.
"Finally, point number three. Dick size. As I have previously mentioned, greater reward in sexual satisfaction contribute to the reason why I find white guys attractive."Hmmm... Not only has she bed all the men in the world, she does it with a measuring tape. Kinky...
Hear this out... Doesn't this seemingly unnoticeable statement sound insulting?
"And I know local guys like those retarded messages with teddies made out of semi-colons and dashes and whatever else."Wow! Now we like retarded things huh? Again, say it with me people, all together now, "Since when did she date the whole of Singapore's male population to make statement like that?"
Sure you might argue that not all SPGs are like this (in her own words self-absorbed, egotistical little bitch. Can I please add; slutty, narcissistic whore?).
And I agree. Its just a few rotten bananas that give the bunch a bad name. I'm not saying its wrong to date (or bed) Caucasian men... but to denounce and define the Asian men as pathethic cheap mummy's boy with the sex life of a monk and a dick the size of a cocktail sausage. That's too much! And that's precisely what she did.
Here's another 'argument' by a more bimbotic airhead SPG complete with Singlish lahs and lohs. This is a must-read!!!
Here's a preview;
"I also think it's very unfair to call Asian women who prefer ang mor men 'sarong party girls'. I mean, we rarely wear sarongs. It covers up too much."
Ditto. Do read it.
Before I sign off, here's a quote from one of Miss Izzy's entry;
"I just don't get turned on by Asian men. Whether or not the lights are dimmed."Well, honey, the feelings are mutual...
5 comments
5 Comments:
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Whilst researching on SPGs, I accidentally found this entry of yours which I find really hilarious, entertaining and dead-on. I had heard that with more couples meeting online, white or not, the SPG was dying but from the looks of your entry, it's alive and kicking (not that I'm cheering for it to be). These SPGs are in it for all the wrong reasons and will probably suffer the consequences of it sooner or later. There's only so much playing field for them to claim on.
Fine.
This comment has been removed by the author.
She is pretty butt ugly! She looks like she has down syndrome too, not that there is anything wrong with it. She is not as hot as she make herself sounds.The fact that she self promotes herself - her pseudo coolness is pathetic. I found those girls blah, it made me (Asian American female) felt stereotyped while visiting Singapore last week.
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