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Triple whammy..
Bitched on: Thursday, December 27, 2007
Time: 12/27/2007 08:48:00 AM
Time: 12/27/2007 08:48:00 AM
It has been two years since my first entry.
A couple of years is actually quite short if you think about it. I have friends who have been blogging for close to six years now.
So anyway, last year for the one year anniversary I wrote a long-winded essay about blogging and what have you. This year I would just like to keep it short and sweet.
The past year has been rather interesting, 'enlightening' would be a better word to describe it. I performed the umrah in June and when I came back, I started another blog: "Hebitch in the Middle East". It was really a spiritually enriching journey. So if you haven't caught it yet, read the blog here (I updated the blog skin for a blog competition; *fingers crossed*).
Another 'highlight' was my Dad's recent heart attack. I know I sound like a broken record, but it has made me realize how 'real' losing someone close to you really is. Then there was the Virginia Tech shootings early this year and the death of the five dragon boaters around a month ago which really made me fathom that death is unpredictable and cruel.
Blogging had helped in the mourning for many. After the deaths, many blogs mushroomed to pay respect to the families of the lost ones as well as to reminiscent the times spent with them. A friend of mine (who lost two of his 'brothers' in Cambodia) answered he couldn't blog well when I asked him why he hadn't written a farewell entry in Jeremy Goh's blog. "Can't be as poetic as the other entries," he said. I told him true poetry came from the heart; if what you feel is written down, not even all of Shakespeare's poems put together can hold a candle to your written piece.
And I feel he had written the most sincere entry in the blog. Not lacking any ounce of hope or grief.
Blogging is as much fun as it is therapeutic. Its really funny to know that friends who you have not heard from in a long time admitting they know almost everything that has been going on in your life from your blog. I feel violated. lol...
I feel that this blog has become a huge part of my life now... very personal and 'me'. Its not merely an extension of myself anymore, in fact, it has somehow grown significantly to shape my character.
How?
There is this expectation from my friends for me to be equally as bitchy in person. So, not to disappoint them, I give them my 'best performance'. While I get my wit from F.R.I.E.N.D.S and my potty-mouth from South Park, the bitchiness is all me, baby...
I realise I haven't been indulging in my loser-ish persona as much as I should. I get a certain kind of a kick sharing my loser moments; just to prove that I am not entirely a bitch. I think I am equally as much a loser as I am a bitch. Says so in my horoscope; I can be a control freak on one end and I can be the bully-able pushover on another.
Sigh... Today was one such day miserable day for myself. First, it was the letter from the Army that gave me that horrible constipated feeling. No, it was not that kind of reservist letter asking me to come for training and stuff, but it was just as bad. It was a letter 'welcoming' me to my new unit. Shit, now I have a unit. Dammit. One step closer to doing the actual reservist...
Then my results were out. Shit, man. I thought I was sure to get As for a couple of my modules but alas, it did not happen (some people just make it look so easy). And I am really upset cause I know I had really put in a lot of effort into those subjects... I worked my ass off okay? Sad... Oh, even Chinese. I am so pissed off, what happened to my A?
Sigh, thought that the shopping 'binge' could cheer me up just now but the jacket I was eyeing from ZARA since a month ago was no longer available in the colour and size that I wanted. So I had to settle for the jacket in a different colour but... its slowly beginning to grow on me.
Acceptance. There are some things you just have to accept.
I am a loser.
A couple of years is actually quite short if you think about it. I have friends who have been blogging for close to six years now.
So anyway, last year for the one year anniversary I wrote a long-winded essay about blogging and what have you. This year I would just like to keep it short and sweet.
The past year has been rather interesting, 'enlightening' would be a better word to describe it. I performed the umrah in June and when I came back, I started another blog: "Hebitch in the Middle East". It was really a spiritually enriching journey. So if you haven't caught it yet, read the blog here (I updated the blog skin for a blog competition; *fingers crossed*).
Another 'highlight' was my Dad's recent heart attack. I know I sound like a broken record, but it has made me realize how 'real' losing someone close to you really is. Then there was the Virginia Tech shootings early this year and the death of the five dragon boaters around a month ago which really made me fathom that death is unpredictable and cruel.
Blogging had helped in the mourning for many. After the deaths, many blogs mushroomed to pay respect to the families of the lost ones as well as to reminiscent the times spent with them. A friend of mine (who lost two of his 'brothers' in Cambodia) answered he couldn't blog well when I asked him why he hadn't written a farewell entry in Jeremy Goh's blog. "Can't be as poetic as the other entries," he said. I told him true poetry came from the heart; if what you feel is written down, not even all of Shakespeare's poems put together can hold a candle to your written piece.
And I feel he had written the most sincere entry in the blog. Not lacking any ounce of hope or grief.
Blogging is as much fun as it is therapeutic. Its really funny to know that friends who you have not heard from in a long time admitting they know almost everything that has been going on in your life from your blog. I feel violated. lol...
I feel that this blog has become a huge part of my life now... very personal and 'me'. Its not merely an extension of myself anymore, in fact, it has somehow grown significantly to shape my character.
How?
There is this expectation from my friends for me to be equally as bitchy in person. So, not to disappoint them, I give them my 'best performance'. While I get my wit from F.R.I.E.N.D.S and my potty-mouth from South Park, the bitchiness is all me, baby...
I realise I haven't been indulging in my loser-ish persona as much as I should. I get a certain kind of a kick sharing my loser moments; just to prove that I am not entirely a bitch. I think I am equally as much a loser as I am a bitch. Says so in my horoscope; I can be a control freak on one end and I can be the bully-able pushover on another.
Sigh... Today was one such day miserable day for myself. First, it was the letter from the Army that gave me that horrible constipated feeling. No, it was not that kind of reservist letter asking me to come for training and stuff, but it was just as bad. It was a letter 'welcoming' me to my new unit. Shit, now I have a unit. Dammit. One step closer to doing the actual reservist...
Then my results were out. Shit, man. I thought I was sure to get As for a couple of my modules but alas, it did not happen (some people just make it look so easy). And I am really upset cause I know I had really put in a lot of effort into those subjects... I worked my ass off okay? Sad... Oh, even Chinese. I am so pissed off, what happened to my A?
Sigh, thought that the shopping 'binge' could cheer me up just now but the jacket I was eyeing from ZARA since a month ago was no longer available in the colour and size that I wanted. So I had to settle for the jacket in a different colour but... its slowly beginning to grow on me.
Acceptance. There are some things you just have to accept.
I am a loser.
Labels: loser moments
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