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Platonic? Bull....
Bitched on: Sunday, April 02, 2006
Time: 4/02/2006 11:42:00 PM
Time: 4/02/2006 11:42:00 PM
Its about time I write this entry.
About what you ask?
Well, about relationships in general and a bit about what's happening in my personal life.
What kind of relationships?
Like Boy-Girl relationships or Boy-Boy relationships or Girl-Girl relationships or wadeva. You get the idea...
So here's the thing. Can a guy and a girl ever have just a platonic relationship?
I was a firm believer until I fell for a good friend of mine... and another friend decades later...
That was centuries ago. I'm not gonna talk about it though... But here's what I wanted to talk about.
I still do want to believe a guy and a girl can have a close friendship without the affection and the I-love-you-You-love-me part.
However, I'm beginning to think otherwise because a really close friend of mine (a great friend, in fact) confessed to me that she has feelings for me. Unfortunately, it wasn't mutual.
(Note to her: I know you are reading this right now but please don't condemn me for relating the story again and writing this entry. Because I have been in your shoes and I hope that by writing this I can put the past behind us and again reiterate that our friendship should not be compromised. I am writing this from the bottom of my heart, and I love you as a friend. And hurting you is the last thing on my mind. I wish you luck with the new man in your life.)
How did I react? I tried to soften the blow for her and did what I thought was the most gentlemanly thing I could do.
I apologised to her and told her of my feelings (or lack of it) for her.
I apologised to her if I had misled her into thinking otherwise. And again I reassured her that our friendship would not be altered and there would be no awkwardness when we are together. Wise move... But that was easier said than done.
Things did get a bit complicated and currently I hope that all these weirdness will just be passing phases.
First there was the over-zealous 'how-are-you-doing' phase, then there was the cold-shoulder phase, then there's the Jack f#$king Twist's 'I-wish-I-knew-how-to-quit-you' phase and eventually its the 'I-met-someone-new-will-you-be-cool-with-that' phase (well babe, like I said, I'm so cool, I'm wearing shades now... ehem... lame.)
Now back to the topic again, can a guy and a girl be the 'bestest' pals without one of them developing feelings for the other or the two suddenly realising the feelings they have for each other?
I still want to believe that you can but that would be hard, wouldn't it?
Eventually somewhere along the friendship, you would stop to think, "Wouldn't we make a nice couple?" or "We look good together, don't we? So what's stopping us?"
Hasn't it crossed your mind?
"She/he is the best friend I ever had," would eventually lead to, "she/he is the best thing that ever happened in my life."
I mean why not?
"We share a lot of things in common, that's why we are friends in the first place.
She/he is the only girl/guy who showers me with that much attention.
She/he is there when I need her/him.
I love her/his company.
She/he knows me inside out.
Saves us the trouble to get to know each other all over again.
I love her/him, and I don't know what I would do without her/him in my life.
And why was that jerk/bitch flirting with her/him?
About what you ask?
Well, about relationships in general and a bit about what's happening in my personal life.
What kind of relationships?
Like Boy-Girl relationships or Boy-Boy relationships or Girl-Girl relationships or wadeva. You get the idea...
So here's the thing. Can a guy and a girl ever have just a platonic relationship?
I was a firm believer until I fell for a good friend of mine... and another friend decades later...
That was centuries ago. I'm not gonna talk about it though... But here's what I wanted to talk about.
I still do want to believe a guy and a girl can have a close friendship without the affection and the I-love-you-You-love-me part.
However, I'm beginning to think otherwise because a really close friend of mine (a great friend, in fact) confessed to me that she has feelings for me. Unfortunately, it wasn't mutual.
(Note to her: I know you are reading this right now but please don't condemn me for relating the story again and writing this entry. Because I have been in your shoes and I hope that by writing this I can put the past behind us and again reiterate that our friendship should not be compromised. I am writing this from the bottom of my heart, and I love you as a friend. And hurting you is the last thing on my mind. I wish you luck with the new man in your life.)
How did I react? I tried to soften the blow for her and did what I thought was the most gentlemanly thing I could do.
I apologised to her and told her of my feelings (or lack of it) for her.
I apologised to her if I had misled her into thinking otherwise. And again I reassured her that our friendship would not be altered and there would be no awkwardness when we are together. Wise move... But that was easier said than done.
Things did get a bit complicated and currently I hope that all these weirdness will just be passing phases.
First there was the over-zealous 'how-are-you-doing' phase, then there was the cold-shoulder phase, then there's the Jack f#$king Twist's 'I-wish-I-knew-how-to-quit-you' phase and eventually its the 'I-met-someone-new-will-you-be-cool-with-that' phase (well babe, like I said, I'm so cool, I'm wearing shades now... ehem... lame.)
Now back to the topic again, can a guy and a girl be the 'bestest' pals without one of them developing feelings for the other or the two suddenly realising the feelings they have for each other?
I still want to believe that you can but that would be hard, wouldn't it?
Eventually somewhere along the friendship, you would stop to think, "Wouldn't we make a nice couple?" or "We look good together, don't we? So what's stopping us?"
Hasn't it crossed your mind?
"She/he is the best friend I ever had," would eventually lead to, "she/he is the best thing that ever happened in my life."
I mean why not?
"We share a lot of things in common, that's why we are friends in the first place.
She/he is the only girl/guy who showers me with that much attention.
She/he is there when I need her/him.
I love her/his company.
She/he knows me inside out.
Saves us the trouble to get to know each other all over again.
I love her/him, and I don't know what I would do without her/him in my life.
And why was that jerk/bitch flirting with her/him?
Oh my God, why am I jealous?"
Pretty convincing reasons , no?
Which reminds me of an episode from my all-time favourite show, F.R.I.E.N.D.S. when Rachel found out about Ross's crush on her and the episode was aptly entitled 'The One Where Rachel Finds Out'.
Rachel, Monica and Phoebe were discussing about the possibilty of Ross and Rachel being together. I quote from Phoebe, "...you two going out together would be like going out on the 15th date..."
Exactly...
Eventually, after a decade of their on and off relationship, the pair finally ended up together. And the show also produced another friends-to-lovers couple, Monica and Chandler.
Kinda makes you wonder if in reality, 2/3 of guy and gal friendships will eventually lead to somewhere, huh?
Pretty convincing reasons , no?
Which reminds me of an episode from my all-time favourite show, F.R.I.E.N.D.S. when Rachel found out about Ross's crush on her and the episode was aptly entitled 'The One Where Rachel Finds Out'.
Rachel, Monica and Phoebe were discussing about the possibilty of Ross and Rachel being together. I quote from Phoebe, "...you two going out together would be like going out on the 15th date..."
Exactly...
Eventually, after a decade of their on and off relationship, the pair finally ended up together. And the show also produced another friends-to-lovers couple, Monica and Chandler.
Kinda makes you wonder if in reality, 2/3 of guy and gal friendships will eventually lead to somewhere, huh?
Who need friends when you have me, me and me...?
Labels: BGR, personal, rubbish
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